The Stroke

On April 30th in 2015 my life changed. I hadn't been feeling well for roughly two weeks before, having suffered from dizzy spells and headaches. I seen my doctor and had a scan at the local hospital but they had passed me as OK. Then finally on the morning of the 30th I started having major dizzy spells that got worse and worse, to the point of feeling absolutely plastered and when you're so drunk you can't stand up because of loss of balance. 

Precisely at the point of losing my balance my wife returned from walking our dogs and quickly realised something was not right and immediately rang the emergency services. By the time they had arrived at my house I was completely immobile, I could not move apart from my eyes, I had what I found out to be locked in syndrome from having had a brain stem stroke. 

Basically I was completely paralysed for two days and then gradually began to have some movement with my arms. I could not talk, but managed to communicate by a letter board although half the time I could not focus on the letters! I remember thinking that I would soon be out and about with no thoughts of fear of permanent paralysis, but it wasn't going to be that easy.

After 5 weeks of being in hospital and basically learning to walk again besides many other things I came out of hospital. But my recovery was really only just starting. When I say walk I could manage a few yards, it took at least another three months to be able to say I was back to walking about half a mile. It's a very weird feeling having to learn to walk again believe me, just putting one leg in front of the other was hard work!

Finally after about five months I came to the decision that it was about time I tried out a little bicycle ride. Attempting to ride a bike round the garden was a bit of joke to start with. I had very little energy and my balance was shot, but I persevered, determined not to give up and finally on about the tenth attempt I managed a short ride the length of the garden, I had succeeded! 

I then attempted a short trip down to my local village and back, which was only about a Kilometre but felt like miles. I succeeded but, any car passing me made me wobble and I was extremely tired. I was trying to cycle once a week and by the third week I was getting past the village and round a few local roads, a reasonable five miles or so. After about the fifth week I attempted a 10 miler and couldn't believe I actually succeeded, it was a major milestone in my recovery and I was over the moon!

Before too long I was soon attempting a twenty mile ride and although it seemed to take forever as I wasn't exactly going at speed, I managed to get round the route and I was then confident that my cycling was not over due to the stroke. However sadly some things did suffer, for the life of me I could not balance on training rollers  and my motor biking days were over due to loss of balance when rounding corners.

But without doubt the biggest difference post stroke was my mental ability, I lost confidence in myself and the frustration of recovery was very difficult, I think looking back now I was on the verge of a mental breakdown, but the one person who stuck by me through it all was my wife. But when these things happen I think of others who have had similar disabilities and not got away with it like myself. I count myself very very lucky indeed.